You’ve just had a baby – your body hurts, your lady bits feel like they might never be the same again, and breastfeeding? Phew. It’s a lot. I know, I’ve been there. And to make it worse, you might have found out by now that your family – husband/partner, parents, and inlaws – aren’t as helpful as you would hope. It’s hard when our support team doesn’t read minds or isn’t able to anticipate our needs for us. So today, I’m talking about my postpartum doula services in a different light: the things your doula will do but your family probably won’t.
Sure, there’s the standard set of postpartum doula services I offer – you can find those here, but my work goes beyond that. I’m here to fill in the gaps that might be overlooked by your family and partner. I’m here to make sure that you are taken care of, the way that everyone else takes care of the newborn.
Yes, I definitely will do things like teaching you about breastfeeding, helping your older children learn about their new sibling, and making sure your body is healing. I offer parent coaching and education and I’m here to help you learn to care for your new baby. I’ll make sure you have the time to eat and rest.
But more importantly – I’m here for you. I’ll listen to your fears and help you navigate this new role you find yourself in. I’ll help you get the resources you need to deal with things like baby blues or pelvic floor issues.
And even more importantly, I’m there for the parent, and especially the birthing person. Sure, holding the baby is the lovely part. But there’s so much more to it. I’ll tend to your needs while everyone coos at the baby.
I’ll do the dirty work like clean up the kitchen and make sure you have something to eat. I’m here for the birthing person as much, if not more, as I am for the baby.
Sometimes grandparents and spouses mean well but new parents often report that they’re not actually helpful. In fact, sometimes visitors make this period of life even harder. It’s not always malicious, it’s just that they’re so excited about the baby, sometimes nurturing the birthing person is overlooked.
As your postpartum doula, I’ll do the things that your family doesn’t want to do so that new parents can rest and enjoy this phase of life.
My services are well-rounded and can be custom-designed to fit your needs. If you know your partner or family will not be able to provide the car you need postpartum, let’s talk.
And to put it bluntly, there is a whole list of things I DON’T include in my postpartum doula services. I know that sounds silly but it’s true. The last thing you want is another person making you feel uncomfortable in this already daunting time.
So here’s what I won’t do:
- Be critical and judgy: Grandmas (perhaps your mother-in-law, bless her heart) and family can be judgemental (sometimes without even knowing they are doing so) when it comes to a new baby. I see it all the time. As your postpartum doula, I will never judge your choices. I’m here to support and educate you, but no matter what you chose, I will honor that. And I’ll even take it a step further, I’ll help you learn to stand up for your choices when people question them so you can be firm in your parenting decisions.
- Take over: As a doula, I’m here to support you, educate you, give you tips but not take over. I’ll work myself out of a job helping you learn to advocate for yourself and trust your parenting instincts. But I’ll never march in and start calling the shots as family members do sometimes.
- Only focus on the baby: Don’t get me wrong, that baby is going to be awfully cute, I love them and I understand them, but believe me, there are plenty of people to focus on the baby. I’ll be here to focus on YOU. To give you the support and care you need to recover and enter this new phase of life.
- Put you down: Sometimes, without even meaning to, families have a way of putting new moms down or shaking their confidence. My job is to build you up, not tear you down. I’ll give you the support and tools you need to rock this new role.
- Listen: Parenting is the hardest job you’ll ever love. It will be wonderful and there may be some woes. I’m here for the hard stuff, to listen and encourage you and your partner. I will be there to serve as a sounding board and help you find your voice so to get your needs met.
So all this to say, while I’ll offer all the postpartum doula services that you’re looking for, my job extends past just that. I’ll be here to fill in space between the birthing person and their families – do to (and not do!) the things you need to heal and recover.
Sending you love!
For more information about my postpartum doula services, don’t wait to contact me, I book up fast. Click here to schedule a free doula consultation to get started.